Final Communication Blog

I would like to say Thank you to everyone for all of their shared knowledge and wisdom. It is nice to hear from those who have been in the field awhile and learn from you all. I look forward to seeing you all in our next class.

Adjourning Groups

The adjourning phase of a group is a time for reflection on what has happened during the time together. It is a time to look at success and failures and decide whether the group will simply now depart each other or perhaps take on another project. If the team built trust there may be lasting relationships and networking that are taken from the group. It is an essential part of the process because it not only adds closure but can provide a clear record of things learned for future groups.
In the military we form groups for so many things. I have been on groups that we call “process improvements”, designed to improve the way we support our staff and patients to better serve our patient and give top notch care. I have been on groups to plan promotions, awards, retirements and sadly many to organize memorial services for fallen soldiers. We form groups to make decisions on how to spend morale funds and improve base services for our young military population as well as their families. Depending on the type of group, we may adjourn by having a dinner, party or maybe even a BBQ.
Groups with clear goals that result in high achievement are always the hardest to leave. These groups make you feel like you are really accomplishing something and adding to the mission. These are also the groups that we tend to build bonds, friendships and network for future needs. The groups that lack this feeling of accomplishment seem more of a waste of time and are very easy to leave.

Conflict Resolution

I recently experienced a conflict with the Director of my daughter’s daycare. The day care lost one of my automatic payments so I had to go in person and give them a hardcopy check. I asked them to please discard the “misplaced” check if found and gave them the check number. A few days later the check was found and the daycare tried to cash it regardless of the fact that I asked them not to. The director is trying to make me pay for the charge they incurred trying to cash a cancelled check. I tried to explain to the director that it was the staff that misplaced the check and that they were informed not to cash it so I should not be charged for their two mistakes. The director would not listen, argued over me and even gave me other parent’s personal information which was very unprofessional. Trying to speak to her was obviously not going to work. I then went back home and typed up the scenario and made a copy of all my payments including the check that the day care lost and the one that I replaced it with. I am hoping that this factual information will help the director to understand, without being able to argue, what took place. I have learned that written communication can sometimes take the face to face confrontation out of a disagreement and allow time for contemplation. I have also learned that if a person is intent on arguing with you and will not listen; arguing will not resolve the issue but only make it worse. I am still waiting on resolution of my situation.

Who I am as a Communicator

I was not surprised to find that the way I view myself and the way others view me differ. That is normally how human nature works. I have always had a fear of public speaking but have had to speak in public quite often throughout my career. I scored myself at a 48 on the communication survey while my husband scored me at 38 and my coworker scored me at 31. My husband knows I do not like to speak in public yet he also has seen me do it for my job and be successful at it. My coworkers have seen me speak and do not know that I have that fear. Therefore my coworker scored me as if I didn’t have this great fear.
My listening styles did not surprise me at all. All of the career and personality tests I have taken throughout my life have indicated that I am a people person. I have always been sensitive and my feeling hurt for others when they are in pain or need. I always mother people and love to help people with their problems. We all grouped me into Group 1 during this survey indicating the same people oriented personality. I love being around people and talking and learning about them.
I do not like confrontation yet I will stand up for what I believe in and let my opinion be known. I scored a 64 on the verbal aggressive survey yet my coworker scored me at a 56. This is because I listen to everyone’s point and do not belittle anyone because we all have different opinion. On the other hand my husband scored me higher with an 81. This is because we have a very different relationship and obviously will argue our points more aggressively than professionally.